People say love is blind! That’s one of the greatest lies of all times. Love can see…and clearly for that matter. Yes love has eyes. How could I have been so blinded? How could I have been so foolish to allow my emotions to be-cloud my reasoning? I thought those goose bump on my skin when I thought about him was love. How would I have ever imagined that because we completed each other’s sentences meant that we were soul mates? Who said those rumbling noise in my tummy whenever he held me meant we were meant for each other? If I had known that love was far from being a feeling maybe I would have seen the warning lights. But no, I chose to be blinded by my own emotions, lusts I would call it. Who would have known he was a beast? A perfect deception, a chameleon. A pathological liar! Each day I curse the day I met him. I blame myself for being so stupid.
It all began on a beautiful Wednesday afternoon. We always had a brainstorming section with representatives from the different units of the organisation and there were about thirty of us. The conference room we usually had our meeting was occupied so we had to make use of an alternative meeting room which was much smaller. There I noticed him. He was well groomed, his shirt was well starched, and everything about him smelt freshness. He was handsome. Yes, he was the most handsome man in that room.
He turned to me and gave me the cutest smile ever…my crush!!! My heart skipped…I must have fainted but thankfully I was seated right behind him.
“How are you today? My name is Kennedy and yours is?” He asked. His eyes danced over my body with a smile still plastered on his face. He was handsome. I must have been tongue-tied. I barely nodded feeling stupid…” Diane” I croaked. Gosh I couldn’t believe my voice…I turned away from him feeling embarrassed.
“I noticed you were quite uncomfortable so I had to adjust my seat” He continued and extended his hands to me “By the way I’m Kennedy. I turned to him, shook him while he held on to my hands much longer than a handshake required. I pulled away gently still feeling awkward.
”I would like to have your number if you don’t mind so that we can chat sometime.” He said with a wink while I smiled for the first time after the awkward moments.
“Nice dentition” he said this time adjusting his seat beside mine.
“Thanks” I replied blushing hard. I would have turned red if I were light skinned. He handed his phone to me while I typed in my digits and handed his phone back to him.
“Thanks. Would buzz you up as soon as I can”. Thank God this briefing is over”.
“Yeah”. I said with a sigh of relief.
Days passed into weeks and weeks into months. I have never been happier. I was living in another world. A perfect world of roses, castles, exotic places. I was in love. Everything I did radiated love. He was the song I sang, I could breathe him. It was heavenly.
Kennedy was a typical description of what most women want in a man – tall, dark and handsome. He was also rich. That was an icing to the cake. He was sensitive to my needs. We went to the most exotic places, I could swear he was the most caring man I’ve ever met. We barely quarrelled and when we had misunderstandings he was the first to make up. Within three months we were already engaged. The proposal was just like a fairy tale. Everyone was happy for me. My mum especially, that I had finally gotten my own husband. I was the envy of my friends.
Two weeks to our wedding, while we were dining at Four Points I noticed his pensive mood.
“What’s the matter Prince? I have never seen you like this before. Is everything OK?” I asked pulling close to him. “You barely touched your food” I asked half concerned and irritated at the same time.
We had both been stressed due to the wedding preparations and it was his suggestion that we had a dinner at an exotic restaurant to unwind.
“I can’t do this. I thought I could….I just can’t!” I was thrown aback, confused and scared. What the hell was he talking about?
“I’m gay Diane!” He continued this time looking at me as if he was waiting for me to absorb the information he had just given to me. I was both dazed and speechless.
It all dawned on me. The day I had paid an unexpected visit at his place and stumbled on a naked guy on his bed with tissue all littered on the bed and floor while he was in the kitchen and his ridiculous explanations. The numerous cancelled dates with the excuse of his line manager needing him urgently. I opened my mouth to speak but could find no words. Tears rolled down my eyes.
“I’m sorry baby. I really thought it could work out. I thought with you things will be different. I was willing to make a fresh start…” he trailed off. I couldn’t take it anymore, I couldn’t just sit there and watch my world crumble before me, I ran like I was chased by the devil himself and then there was screeching sounds and blackout!