You all hate the fact that you love me.
I am a GSM service provider.
My colour is green.
I am very big and very rich.
All the celebrities love me.
I have the best adverts on Tv.
I have the best music and comedy shows in town.
All the celebrities are my ambassadors.
I sign up anybody and anything in the entertainment industry. As long as you can smoke Oshogbo weed, mumble some meaningless lyrics over a studio beat, and get people dancing to your song all over the country, I will rush in and give you millions of Naira to endorse my brand.
My internet service is just too good to be true.
I give you the cheapest internet.
My data size is the largest you can get, in fact you can’t exhaust it.
When you try to connect on my high speed internet network, I turn into a snail.
My internet signals appear and disappear like willy willy the ghost.
I am here to teach you the virtue of patience.
I slow with pride.
My name is Globacom and I am good for nothing!
Iniobong Leroi Umoh