Posted in Cave Tales, Cave View, Uncategorized

My Grouse With Motivational Speakers – Edward Onoriode

Several years ago, I was seated on my sofa in my one room apartment thinking of my miserable life and why in Pete’s sake was I born a Nigerian.
That period of my life, I was broke, I had only 18k in my GTB savings account and my expenses for that month alone was running to about 40k. I became depressed, frustrated and tired of life. Power holdings Plc were living up to their name and I had no fuel in my gen set but luckily, my Nokia Asha phone then had a radio so I put on the radio and tuned in on Rhythm FM where a lovely RnB music was playing.

As the music was playing, a radio presenter wickedly interrupted the music and began to talk to a man. The man the radio presenter was talking to was a motivational speaker.
The motivational speaker began to talk about how he had motivated people and made them rich over night. He mentioned some few names who had become rich after listening to his motivational speeches in one of his various seminars and he didn’t forget to speak about his humble beginning and pride about his riches — his posh car, beautiful house in choice area, and several other stuff to persuade whoever is listening to him to get motivated. After talking for about 15 minutes, he told his listeners to attend a 2-day seminar he’s organising the following weekend for just 10k and get motivated to become rich like him and other people he had motivated.

The speaker on the radio was a sweet talker and I was emotionally lifted with his sweet talks. One good trait about motivational speakers is that they are good with words and can weave words together to convince their listeners.
I needed to break free from poverty and become rich like this motivational speaker. The address of the seminar was announced on the radio so I penned it down.

What got me enticed with the seminar was how convincing the motivational speaker sound, in his words ” My name is Promise and I’m a motivational speaker. I’ve been able to make many young people become millionaires over night. Next week I will run a two days seminar and show you the secrets on how to become rich. All you need to do is to pay 10k to attend my 2-day power packed seminar on the hidden secrets to become rich. These secrets I want to share with you is a age long secret which many millionaires and billionaires rarely give out. Two years ago, I attended a seminar at South Africa where I learnt some of these secrets I’m gonna teach you on my 2 days power packed seminar on how to become rich. The rich don’t want you to be like them so they keep these golden secrets hidden to themselves and their children alone. That’s why the rich keeps getting richer and the poor keeps getting poorer. I have over 1000 secrets to help you break free from poverty and become rich over night with little or no start up capital. If you attend my 2-day power packed seminar, I will unravel all the hidden secrets to riches and I can assure you that within 3 months, your life will never be the same again. Also, for those without a capital to start up a business, you don’t need to bother your head. All you need is to pay the 10k entrance fee to my seminar and UBA which is a major partner to my seminars will give you a “No Wahala” loan without collateral which will help you start your own business and become rich over night”
Who wouldn’t want to attend such a seminar after listening to that promising speech? We all want to be rich, and the icing of the seminar is the promise of granting a loan to poor people without any collateral from a reputable bank like UBA.?

Calls started flying in from various parts of the country. Everyone wants to attend the seminar. Everyone wants to know the hidden secrets to riches. We all must make this money. The address to the seminar began to echo on the radio. “Centre for Management Development (CMD) Management village, off Lagos-Ibadan Expressway by old toll gate, Shangisha, Ikeja Magodo – Phase II, Lagos.” the motivational speaker kept echoing the seminar address.
On the date of the seminar, I ignorantly withdrew 10k out of the 18k I had in my account with the hope that I’d become rich over night within three months. Lol
At the seminar venue, over 500 people were standing at the entrance to the hall of the seminar on a very long queue paying 10k each sheepishly to some UBA reps. Each attendee all have one thing in common, we all want to learn how to break free from the shackles of poverty overnight. While on the queue, I brought out my phone and calculated the amount the motivational speaker will rake home within two days of the seminar and it was over N5M. Something keep telling me to go back home that this man has nothing to offer other than collect my money to enrich himself in the name of entrance fees to his seminar but I keep reassuring myself that there’s nothing wrong in taking risks. Let me take this risk after all, its just 10k. That’s how the witches and wizards in my village deceived me oooo.

After I paid my entrance fee, a badly photocopied black and white handout of about 100 pages was given to me as a guide to the hidden secrets to success. I couldn’t read more than 3 pages of that badly photocopied black and white handout before I gave it out to one woman that sells akara in my streets then.
You can imagine such wickedness! This so called motivational speakers don’t have conscience at all.

When I got to the seminar hall, the motivational speaker was just speaking big grammar and rambling on how he became rich out of nothing and how he had motivated people to become rich. Two other guest speakers took turns to ramble aimlessly in the name of motivation as if they’re competing on who was poorer before they became rich.
After the over four tortuous and boring hours listening to the motivational speakers, a refreshment was given to us before the first day seminar came to a boring end. I was weak but glad the seminar ended nonetheless. I couldn’t get the secrets I needed to become rich.

I cried that I parted ways with my precious 10k. The UBA ‘no wahala’ loan the motivational speaker promised to help assist poor people like me to start up a business came with so many hidden wahalas. When I read the terms and conditions of the loan, I knew its better to remain poor than collect such loan.
The following day, I blatantly refused to attend the seminar because I knew its gonna be the same boring and torturous sermon.

Most if not all motivational speakers don’t know how to make money outside the fees they charge their audience to attend their seminars. Motivational speakers only know how to speak big and verbose grammar to confuse their audience after they’ve ignorantly paid them their hard earned money to listen to their sermons.
Stop paying all these so called motivational speakers your hard earned money to get motivated. You’re a motivation yourself. Its not easy to go out and hustle daily. Its not easy to put food on the table. The moment you go out daily to earn a honest living, you’re a motivation.

You don’t need someone to tell you how to make money. If money is so easy to make, let them go out and hustle like you and me and stop attaching a price tag to their sugar-coated speeches.

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